Waking up each morning to my six stone hairy soul mate sprawled across my bed as I hang on with dear life to my allocated few inches of mattress is pure bliss. Even with an outstretched paw attempting to clog up my nostrils as Munch attempts his graceless doggy hug, his carefree attitude is contagious. The eternal expectation of belly rubs and utter adoration from every being around him, allows him to rest in that place of surrender that most of us battle with throughout life. Appreciating the here and now can be that well needed pause button to help remind us that we always have more to be thankful in life than we know. Carefree living emerges from actively embracing the act of surrender.
As we approach the summer solstice and celebrate the light within us that flows inwards and outwards, it is an ideal time to reflect on what really matters in life. Growth and evolution around this time of year comes from exploring what lies in this natural pause button zone in life. Whether or not you celebrate the Summer Solstice , it is a natural half way point in the year to stop and take stock of your life as you live it today. Now that life is returning to normal for most after the pandemic many are realising that life is a constant state of change and in reality there is very little we can do about it. Learning to go with the flow on life is kinder to your soul that battling against the change that will always win in the end.
On a personal level, the idea of choosing stress as a focal point in life seems just to draining. Admitting to ourselves that we choose stress instead of surrendering to and overcoming things peacefully can trigger our ego into denying that we are the ones feeding our stress to keep it alive. Reminding ourselves that we are in control of how we react to situations instead of situations controlling how we react can mean the different between carefree and stressful living.
Having worked in mental health for 27 years in various roles and having the blessing of sight loss (a blessing I will always treasure), I have learnt a thing or two about the benefits of carefree living. Here are just a few tips of how to implement carefree living into your own life
1 Leave go of perfection. The only permanence in life in impermanence so battling against what is inevitably will only lead you to create unhappiness in your life.
2. See outcome as just a bonus. Allowing yourself to enjoy being in the moment and creating a feel good energy in the here and now allows you to ignore the ‘what if’s’
3. Count your blessing. Literally count your blessing by writing down what you have in life and what you are thankful for. Each day try to increase the list by at least 5 things and you can include loved ones physical possessions, memories and anything else that has got you to where you are today.
4. Learn to laugh at yourself. Chances are you are more of a comedian than you think. Think of all the times you have messed up in epic ways and still lived to tell the tale. See mistakes as just trial runs that went a little wonky.
5. Surround yourself by happy people. Emotional vampires won’t help your quest for carefree living at all so seek elsewhere. Changing your outlook and general energy to a more positive one will make you more likeable to others which in turn will natural make them want to spend more time with you.
6. Step outside of your “me” bubble. Remind yourself that the world is not about you but about us all. When we stop and connect to others , we learn to press pause on our overthinking and dramatising of life events that cannot be changed. Entering into the energy of you sharing your world with others equally helps you also realise that your pain in life in not unique but is a shared human experience that people learn to become at peace with and you are no difference.
7. Always choose kindness. Kindness to yourself and others will boost you in every area of life. From increased self esteem, higher immune system and health in general through to positive life chances, kindness can be the change in life you have been searching for. Kindness is a simple cure to nearly every problem in life.
8. Own yourself not others. You are always in full charge of who you are so learn to be at peace with yourself and don’t allow others to define you. The reverse is also true as we should never want to control another as people are not possessions so how others behave or think has nothing to do with you.
Carefree living is not the same as careless living. Caring about the important things in life and leaving go of our need to control things can help us take life back to a simpler way of being. Whether you are seeking belly rubs in life or wanting to use less hair dye on the grey stress strands appearing in your hair take time this Summer Solstice to declutter your emotional baggage and rest in the energy of just being.