Each year our canine cuties bring award winning achievements into our lives, which deserve honouring. From Gwyn the German Shepard rescuing it’s human family from burning buildings, to Bertha the Bichon Frise strutting her stuff on the Dog walk to win hair style of the year, each dog should be celebrated. There are of course exceptions to every rule. For there to be a top of the list hierarchy, there also needs to be well….bottom of the list too. Interestingly, there are some dogs that slide between top dog and mischief maker is milliseconds. The category that these furry fireballs belong too is “The Angelic Rogues”. For the sixth year running, Minster Cooper (a.k.a. Munch) has stolen the prize for his consistant and outstanding achievements in this area yet again.
Born to beautifully behaved nurturing mother Hettie (a black labrodor) and perfectly presented boffin dad Pringle (a handsome cream poodle), Munch first placed his paw prints on this world on 18th December 2014. Arguable, the naughtiest in the litter, Munch left a mark on people’s hearts (and patience levels) since day one. Never one to shy away from the limelight, Munch has always succeeded in being central to any drama that unfolds in his vicinity without fail. His expertise in deflection has always allowed him to use his innocent looks to throw any onlookers off the truth trail whilst they look elsewhere for the source of mischief.
Playing Tug of War with a fellow canine whilst using a net curtain instead of a rope, was an early sign of his creativity during his first few months of life. After getting off a flower bed after a row only to seconds later get on another flower bed (repeated multiple times) shows that Munch has wonderful decision making skills that are malleable to any situation. From these examples of creativity and decision making skills it is clear to see why Munch was destined to be …..a Guide Dog. I mean, with such a personality what could possibly go wrong?
Taking Guide Dog training all in his huge stride, Munch passed with flying colours. Obedience training must have been…interesting. With the determined poodle streak shining out for multiple galaxies to see, Munch learnt how to use his ‘On-duty angel, off-duty rascal’ sides of his personality to the max. A straight A student on harness in work mode, he learnt how to build up enough good boy points to transfer them to his time off tantrums so that he would not get in trouble. Acquired knowledge has been key in the career path of this Angelic Rogue.
After being placed with his ‘owner’ four years ago (ha ha, as if anyone could ever own him), he turned the tables pretty quick by demonstrating his world class Leadership skills. After the very first meeting, he manageaged to single pawedly turn her into his maid. Always out front in or out of harness, Munch has led her along many paths whether she wanted to go there or not. He even got her to write a book about him and how talented he was. As What You See When You Can’t See flew off the shelves in 2019, he was perplexed to why it had taken this long for anyone to say how amazing he was. He knew that not only was he the best Labradoodle in the world but arguable the best dog in the universe. It was just a shame that the maid kept bringing up some mishaps that had occurred along the way.
Admittedly, there was that incident that got his human grandmother stuck on his back after a funeral, as he attempted to take his 32 Inch high body under her 25 Inch legs, but that was just a case of a mathematical miscalculation. The wanted posters for the worlds’ biggest ball thief that just happens to resemble him is not him he assures everyone, just a wannabe. A swift investigation of an alleged pasty thieving incident from the hands of a 3 year old was quickly quashed as Munch argued she was holding it out for him to eat. Panini Gate, where Munch upped his stakes from pasty to panini from the outstretched hand of a pupil, was happily settled out of court with the gift of a replacement panini and box of chocolates. Up until now, Munch has kept his good reputation. Things did change however earlier this week.
Trotting along on his free run, he came across one of his favourite things. A stick. Unfortunately, said stick was being held in the hands of a young boy which meant only one thing to Munch. Playtime. As Munch gently attached himself to the other end of the stick and happily pranced alongside the chatty boy, a friendship was made. Unfortunately, the friendship was short lived when the boy threw the stick for Munch to fetch and Munch brought back half the stick a few minutes later. The little boys dream of fighting dragons with his once powerful stick was now shattered as he had to set his sights on fighting ants instead. Apologies were made and another stick found but it wasn’t quite the same as the dragon fighting weapon he once knew.
Stern words have been had with Munch about taking sticks off children which is just as bad as stealing sweets from them. His eye rolls and sights say it all really, the Angelic Rogue doesn’t see the fuss. He believes munching on sticks is his God given right as a dog. It has been a hard decision but it is only fair that he will be placed in the Doggy Hall of Shame until he feels remorse for his actions. The only thing is, he sees it as another badge of honour as he sits under the Mischief Maker of the Month category. He has his eyes set on the Mayor of Mayhem award which we will keep you updated on. There is always one and it’s always him!
Hey, come and meet my new best friend! I heard the maid wrote a post about me a little while ago saying that it was taking me time to get used to Faith the tortoise. Well, let me tell you MY version of events before you make up your mind about who is right and which maid was wrong.
I have known Faith and Hero (her brother) for the last two years and I have often gone up to the vivarium that they were in or the run outside that they exercised in and graced them with seeing my handsome face. I knew that my face would brighten up anyone’s day as who could resist my Labradoodle good looks? I sometimes barked to ask them if they wanted to come and play but the spoil sports never did.They lived with my two legged less hairy grandparents so I knew them quite well and it was on top of their indoor home that my treats were kept so there will always be a special place in my heart for them ( I mean my treats but I suppose I also mean the tortoises) .
When Hero went missing a few weeks ago after they had both hatched an escape plan from their outdoor run, my grandparents felt like they needed to be somewhere where they had more freedom, so the maid offered to have them. Hero is still missing in action although we believe he is exploring the great outdoors of the lush Welsh land so will be fine and will not starve. Faith however has made herself comfy in MY home.
Apparently, my barking at her when she arrived and touching her with my paw and mouth was not acceptable, so the maid kept us apart for a while. I finally got around to train the maid to give me a treat for every time I was around Faith on my lead and didn’t bark. The next step I trained her in was when she allowed me to go near Faith without my lead on. I remained silent and had masses of fuss and a treat. This training process of my maid only took me a matter of four days which was impressive as it usually takes me longer to train her in other areas.
We have now got to the stage that I go and find Faith when the maid asks me too and sniff her out where I will stay with her until the maid comes over. As the maid cannot see, I am her eyes in looking after Faith and have gone to get her a few times when Faith gets stuck between two objects and needs rescuing.
Although I am still top dog in the family and the two legged less hairy race, Angus and Faith are below me, I am willing to admit that I like having all of these around. Faith and I will get on just fine I think as I admire her pace of life and her low maintenance ways doesn’t interfere with my high maintenance standards. I think we will soon become best of friends.
Bring on the next challenge of letting me train my maid and trick her into giving me treats to stop my”unacceptable “behaviour. I wonder when my next new best friend will arrive for some more delicious training treats?
How hard can it be introducing a new pet into the family? The moment Munch stepped paw into the house two and a half years ago, he was confronted with Angus my adorable black rescue cat who wouldn’t say boo or meow to a goose. He did however want to say hiss to a great big oaf of a Labradoodle that came hurtling through his front door. A swift swipe of his outstretched paw told Munch that he was being met with a hostility stand off rather than a welcoming committee. That set the tone for the relationship that they have today. Sweet Angus still rules, and Munch just obeys which to be fair is shocking as Angus is the only non-staff members of Munch in the family.
Now we have a new animal on the block in the form of my parent’s adorable tortoise Faith, Her brother Hero is still missing in action having escaped from their garden three weeks ago. The plan is that if he returns form his little jaunt, then he will be coming to join his sister in his new habitat. Introducing Faith to Munch has not been as smoothly as we had imagined though as he is not sure what to make of this odd-looking walking shell. A sniff here and there has only added to his confusion to this non canine like creature.
We have been searching like mad for the best way to introduce a tortoise to mischievous Munch and we are still crossing our fingers that he will soon act nonchalant like he does to everyone else. Apart from squirrels, he never gets this excited over any living being so I am crossing every body part that I have, that his excited barks will soon ease off and be replaced by a silent glance over his shoulder as he watches Faith slowly walk past him on a lazy afternoon stroll. Surely her chilled out attitude in life will speak to his inner sloth and they can become the best of friends.
Until then short bursts of sniffing Faiths new home, alternating access to free runs in the garden and treats for every time he does not bark and try and scare sweet Faith may be the way forward. I am crossing my fingers that I will one day be able to take a picture of Munch, Angus and Faith all being friends as their beautiful soul’s merge into a trio of friends.
How dare he come into my lake (okay my pond but my home so I will call it what I want) and leave without permission. Does he not realize how magnificent Swans such as I are, and that we decide who we welcome or reject in our home? I knew straight away that he was one that could be easily manipulated. He was as threatening as a leaf as he gently tip toed into my territory. I could sense straight away that he wasn’t one of those small yappy dogs that wanted to fight everything including its shadow. He was a big softy.
Led by his mischief, he come close enough to say hello but far enough away not to get pecked. I am glad he knew the rules that he must abide by with me from the word go. Having a quick gander around I could see most of the other swans and ducks were elsewhere so I thought I may as well have some entertainment with my new hairy friend.
As the featherless and relatively hairless two legged being that was with this dog chatted away to others of the similar species, I heard him say that the dog was not his, but he was a friend of the owners. How ridiculous the two-legged species can be believing that they own a dog. Try owning a swan and see how far they get.
Apparently, my new play mate was called Munch. I instructed Munch that we would be playing chase around the pond and he seemed fine with it. Obviously, I was the leader and he trailed behind me like an after-thought. Okay well, he was quite a cute after thought but I didn’t want to tell him that and inflate his ego as I didn’t want him thinking he was equal to a swan. Gliding off gracefully in my regular haunt, I could hear him panting heavily behind me as he doggy paddled at speed to keep up. It was so much fun circling back around him and chasing him back.
The laughter I heard coming from the banks from the two-legged kind made us put on more of a show. Is it that bizarre for a swan and a dog to be play mates? I heard the man that Munch was with saying that he had taken pictures to show his owner (pfft, Munch told me he calls her his maid). My heart sank a little when I saw him heading for the bank for the last time. He woofed that he will be back soon for another play date. He seems to respect my pond (which I told him was really the best lake in the world and he believed me), so he is welcome to come back for a game of chase whenever he wants.
Until we meet again Munch, keep being the gentle soul that you are.
Happiness is a state accessible to all, but only chosen by some. If we sat back and let animals teach us a thing or two about the correlation between simplicity and happiness, we would live in a far more tranquil world. Here are the top ten tips that my furry Guru has taught me over the last nearly two years.
1. Treat everyone as your friend. I admit that licking everyone you see may not be the best option but meeting people with fresh enthusiasm brightens up the day for you both.
2. Explore, explore, explore. Doing the same thing in the same way everyday will only bring the same results. Stale minds can find it hard to find happiness in habits so expand your horizons to find happiness in places that you never knew existed.
3. Don’t stress about fiction. Differentiate between fact and fiction. No animal spends time fretting over the “what if’” in life but only deal with situations that that are in front of them. Why worry about something that may never happen instead of enjoying what is?
4. Live for the now and forget the how. Don’t plan your life away just do what makes you happy. Animals always trust in the unknown source of their survival. Each day is an opportunity to fall in love with your life if you wish to do so.
5. At every given opportunity, play. Forgetting how to play is the root cause of much unhappiness if life. Mimicking the spontaneous funny five minutes of playful fun seen in many animals, can recharge our batteries and help us rediscover the fun in the monotony in life.
6. Be peacefully strong. The stronger the animal, the more peaceful they can be. Inner strength from knowing your capabilities is far better than trying to overt your power over another to try and convince yourself and others of your strength.
7. Communication is key. Picking up on the spoken and unspoken word early on can keep conflict at bay. Interaction can not be a success by speaking and not listening. Cooperation is key to live in harmony with others.
8. Always be yourself. We fall in love with animals for their quirky ways and we should do the same for humans. Celebrating the individuality of over 7 billion people in the world is an easier task if you can learn to celebrate your own individuality.
9. Show compassion even when it is hard. Interspecies friendships show no boundaries’ even when it is difficult. Learning the needs and wishes of another helps us move beyond ourselves and be more compassionate.
10. Spread your magic wherever you go. Each living being has a way about them that will attract the masses. If every being in the world left a trail of their beautiful essence wherever they visit, happiness would be nothing but inevitable.
Munch’s manifesto of hsppiness is my go-to place of enlightenment in times of uncertainty. I know he won’t mind if you ever feel like visiting it too.
As the harness comes into his view, he freezes. If he stays perfectly still he may fool me into thinking that temporary paralyses has set in and he will have to remain rooted to the bed. If he stays here long enough, I may get bored and loose interest in the battle of wills that we have had daily for the last 18 months. I know that he is trying his hardest to manifest someone apart from his maid to come and snatch the harness off her and take him out on his lead for some fun. Despite going for a run earlier on in the day with his favourite dog walker, he would not say no to another. Why work when you can play all day?
I use the word work in the loosest of terms as work for Munch is never really work. As his nose follows his favourite urine scent, he sometimes chooses the route if we are out for a wander instead of on a mission, He can recognize a dog lover from afar and always tries his best to get a treat from their doggy friendly pockets in exchange for a loving look. He ambles along a pathway at his own pace as he searches for playmates along the way, trailing me after him like an after-thought. As specially bought dog bowls appear for him in our usual haunts, he settles down for his queue of fans that line up for him. So, when I say work, it is open to interpretation.
Munch on the other hand thinks I am working him far too hard for a dog of his status. Before and after our walks, we have cuddles and chats where he looks me deep in the eyes (I think) and seems to understand everything I say. Until I say the dreaded walk word that is. As he walks out of the door shaking his butt like Beyoncé with his tail happily wagging against my leg, I know that he loves it when he gets going, but he just loves to create drama out of fresh air. Without laying out a trail of treats from his rooted position to the front door, I do not think our stubborn standoff will ever change.
If I am honest I wouldn’t want him to change from the Diva dog that he is. Waiting around for his swaying butt to get into action allows him to feel that his protest is being heard. After the hundredth kiss that I place on his nose I know that he will soon get up and go for the walks that he secretly loves. Playing the waiting game with such a strong-willed character gives me time to reflect on the important things in life. As I allow him to do things in his own time it teaches me some well needed patience. Perfection is always worth waiting for.
As I gently put his harness over his head and wait for him to raise up for me to clip it under his stomach, I think back to what it was like without him. Getting around when you secretly cannot see feels like a full-time job. When you are gifted with a colleague to half your work therefore, you will always feel indebted to them regardless of any faults. As we carry on working on his terms in his own time, I feel blessed that I have the best work colleague ever and wouldn’t change him for the world. Best things come to those who wait.
Whoever said that you should never work with animals or children, obviously led a far too serious life. Avoiding these two groups of free spirited souls in your work takes the fun out of life. If you get the chance, work with both animals and children at the same time to maximise the element of surprise in your working day. I promise you, there will never be a dull moment.
Having worked with children for many years. I have yet to feel bored. From children talking about the talented farting habits of their proud fathers to drawing up plans together for a Theme Park for nasal secretions to play in, you always feel privileged to be allowed into the world of imagination of a child. Shame has yet to make an appearance in the world of the chatty child, so you get to hear and witness a lot of the innocent perspectives that they have on the world.
Working with animals holds the same feelings of needing to surrender to the challenges that you will be faced with. I can only talk from experience of working with Minster Munch, my Diva Guide Dog. I have learnt over these 17 months that my obedience to his commands needs working on. Following his directions, pulling him free from places he has wedged himself in and apologising for him licking some poor unsuspecting strangers food debris covered hand, just reminds me that his professionalism sometimes slips and lets his true colours shine.
Mix both child and animal together and be prepared for some wonderful life lessons. If you happen to be out with you Guide Dog and he leaves a little urine shrine in the middle of the bread aisle of Tesco for the first and last time ever, use your legs as a substutute A Frame Wet Floor Sign until a cleaner can be located. If a nearby child excitedly tells their parents that the dog with a funny thing on its back has peed on the floor and asks if they can do the same, try and cover up the inner giggle. As you help the parents to try to avoid a pee splash pad developing in the middle of the aisle, secretly feel proud that the momentary meeting of these two souls provides such a deep empathetic connection.
If you happen to find yourself in the middle of an empty staff room in school working with a child and your Guide Dog becomes their new best friend, expect some caring and sharing to happen. As you are blind and cannot see the “Please Help Yourself” sign that is propped up next to the plate on inviting cupcakes, thank the child for explaining to you what you can suddenly hear them munching on. Inwardly celebrate the fact that the child is following instructions by helping themselves to a cake and feeding a bit to the dog. The fact that you were previously told that this child does not like to comply and follow instructions is clearly not true as they happily read and obeyed the sign.
If you happen to find yourself calling the caretaker to remove a ball that has got stuck in an ancient light fitting, just breath and remain calm. Explaining that the incident happened after the ball bounced off your Guide Dogs nose or clients hand may bring about questions that you don’t really want to answer but do it anyway. Apologise profusely to the disgruntled caretaker who mutters under his breath as he leaves the room. With the slam of the door reassure the child and dog that these things happen but its lovely to see them playing together. For a child who finds it difficult to connect with others around them, explain to the child how they will always have a loyal friend in a non-human. Embrace the warm feeling that it gives you when they cuddle into each other and feel the unconditional love that they get for one another.
Children and animals may not ever do what you want them to do but maybe we should just stop and learn from these great teachers about the true meaning of life. The purity of the mind of the child and simplicity of the outlook on life that an animal has, can help us put our own lives in perspective. I dread the day when I stop working with my beautiful dog and the amazing children as I too may enter that serious world others are forced into. When work never feels like work, you know you are on your correct life path.
My two-legged maid knows how to please her master. I have trained her so well.
Unlike the others that have tried to ‘train’ me, this one is such a pushover. I do allow her to go and get the tasty food in the shops that we tend to eat. My boring bag of food that us Guide Dogs must stick to is so bland and I need a bit of variety in life. I don’t think these two legged partially haired beings understand how unfair it is to eat lovely tasting food yet leave me eating this boring ‘nutritious’ dog food. Do the humans not realize that trapping me inside my ‘Please Do Not Feed Me’ harness is sheer torture? At least I have persuaded my maid that giving me a treat or two is well deserved, as I am such a hard-working dog.
I lead her to the usual spots in the supermarket when she says what food she wants, and I show her where it is, turn around and wait in front of the spot she needs. She doesn’t realize that as she is busy picking up the food that my pitiful eyes may persuade her to share later, I am blissfully sniffing everything at my level. Half way through my sniff filled shopping trip, I lead the way to my favourite aisle where doggy dreams are fulfilled. I am surrounded by dog and cat food galore and squeaky destructible toys to add to my vast collection. I may even find a treat or two on the shelf or floor from a damaged bag that I will hoover up discreetly. I love these aisles and will take my maid into any shops that have these aisles of utopia and she is daft enough to let me.
Ear rubs, chin strokes and general adoration that is bestowed upon me can have the same effect on me as food. I will never reject either of these. I see it only fair therefore that I also choose which shops to go into, so I can receive the greatest attention from my loyal fans. I am currently mourning the closure of one of my favourite shops. I used to go there for a calming chill whilst my maid bought some beautiful gifts and where we went downstairs for meditation classes. I whine as I pass this favourite old shop of mine, but I am lucky my maid knows the owner well, so I will still see this loving owner.
Give me a toy shop filled with masses of cuddly toys and my heart gets excited at the thought of being able to dive into them, and cuddle in as I do at home. Give me the glories of a sports shop, where once I found a tennis ball lost on the floor ready for me to find and take home without my maid noticing. I am so glad she is blind sometimes as I get away with so much. Give me clothes shops however and I am not a happy dog. As soon as I smell the chemically scented products that dress the two-legged race, I try and stamp my paw in protest. I really dislike these funny smelling places and wish I was like other dogs where I could be tied up outside and be spared the persecution of parading around such a pointless place.
I will continue to try and train my maid to understand my shopping needs better. A happy dog means a happy maid, so I had best get on with her training. Wish me luck.
If Munch and I had to describe our lives with a quote it would be the wise old saying “The only permanence in life is impermanence”. When matching a Guide Dog to a potential Guide Dog user, the personality, needs, adaptability and lifestyle of both are carefully considered to enable a perfect match. Our match was a match made in heaven as my spontaneity and varied life paired perfectly with his desire to conquer every corner in a thirty-mile radius. Where many Guide Dogs take a while to get used to one route, Munch memorizes them instantly. Each day I try to vary our routes as much as possible to keep both our brains from becoming stale.
After his morning body massage and breakfast yesterday, we decided to go shopping. After a 30-minute car journey to get to the nearest city, Munch sprung out of the car, following his inquisitive nose in hope of a day of freedom. When he saw his works harness he pouted slightly knowing that he had to work. His displeased demeanour soon changed as some new fans began to stop him in the street to tell him how handsome he was. His satellite like ears have alerted him to the fact that when his fans use the words “Handsome, beautiful, unusual looking, unique, stunning, gorgeous” and many other words then this is the point that the ice has broken, and a friendly pat will soon follow. He is the one that usually causes the distraction of others not the other way around.
Leaving his trail of admirers behind, he carried on until he noticed one of his kind pulling towards him. I was wondering why he was pulling so much but when I heard a dog friendly voice saying “Look, its another Guide Dog” I knew that one of his work colleagues were close. As both dogs sniffed and pulled to greet each other affectionately, the owner told us that it was his late wife’s retired Guide Dog that he had with him. He spoke lovingly for a while about his late wife and how he had chosen to keep her Guide Dog as she felt like a member of the family and could not face loosing her too. Within his grief-stricken voice, it was clear that he valued meeting a fellow Guide Dos user as there is sense of belonging to this welcoming yet often isolated community.
After Munch had his routine sniffs in some doggy aisles in shops, we headed home. On the way home, we stopped to give him a bit of a run, so he could leave off his pent up impish energy. As I walked with my white cane, I hooked his harness over my shoulder and was stopped by someone who said he was a fundraiser and campaigner for Guide Dogs. We had a lovely long chat about the stories of his 15 years of work with them as Munch ran around like a tornado.
After bribing Munch back in the car with a treat or 5, we headed off to the local supermarket. As soon as we entered, a familiar voice came to talk to us. It was one of our friends from the Visual Impairment support group who was waiting to be allocated a guide dog himself. We got talking about my “Unusual” Guide Dog who he fell in love with when they first met. As Munch dived in for some fuss, he told me that he was still waiting for his Guide Dog 2 years on. He is such a funny, unique, sociable man and we concluded that the dog that they matched with him would be as quirky as Munch so maybe they were creating a robotic dog to fit in with his extraordinary personality. It was nice however to give him hope and tell him that the long wait for a Guide Dog would be well worth it.
This day filled with synchronicity was a welcomed treat to a world where you can sometimes feel detached from the walking blurs around you. Munch has masses of attention wherever he goes which is lovely but meeting others who understand the work that these astonishing animals do is rare. I can go weeks without meeting anyone who understand the magic that these dogs bring into a persons’ life and then there are these London Bus Syndrome days where 3 come along at once. In one day the universe lined up the story of one knowledgeable soul needing to be compassionately heard, one old timer in the field and one patient man waiting to enter into this world of Guide Dog magic. It will be hard to beat this trilogy on our next spontaneous day out.